Norman Camps out in Sweden
Looks like Norman’s contemplating life itself, doesn’t it? Well, don’t be fooled – he’s not. He is actually sulking. Epically. Some background: Norm is basically a global celebrity now (as if you didn’t know). He has been conquering and charming his way all over the world since time immemorial (aka November 2011).
But on a recent trip to Sweden to pay homage to his Scandinavian heritage, something was seriously awry. People everywhere were not falling at his feet, kowtowing in adulation. Instead, they were stopping, and POINTING. And LAUGHING! Outrageous! He was apoplectic.
At first he thought he thought it was his height, which has always been something of a sore point (don’t tell him we said so, but he is actually shorter than the average adult human male) but we quickly realised it was something else. It was his nose. His big, bright blue nose. Could it be… could it be that this great warrior, this fearless vagabonder, was… cold?
Chaos ensued. Norman’s entire macho-tastic reputation was at stake. Before we knew it, he was fleeing into the Swedish wilderness, humiliated, and it was all we could do to keep up. He finally paused at a suitable looking camp and from that moment refused to acknowledge anything was amiss. His behaviour, however, suggested otherwise, because it looked, for all the world, like he was trying to warm up…
This is the only close-up shot we managed to capture before he went to bed. We had persuaded him to play hide and seek, but this is not a game Norman excels at. When this was taken, he was convinced he was invisible to the world.
The lake looked tempting enough, but after performing a triple back somersault into it seconds after this was taken, it became apparent it was slightly colder than first suspected.
A camp fire seemed a sensible option, but all his wailing earlier in the day had resulted in Norman losing his voice. And he refuses to sit by a camp fire if he can’t sing Kumbaya.
Norman fortunately realised the perilous nature of this particular spot with seconds to spare, and hopped off quicksmart.
A hot tub. Perfect! Surely this was the answer?
We never had time to find out – nature called.
Norman thought he was onto a winner when he spied this teepee tent.
It was a bit on the small side, but he was willing to make an exception due to the gravity of the situation.
He climbed high to inspect his home for the night.
And built a fire…
…and went to bed. Surely a night in a teepee tent with a raging fire close by would be enough to turn his nose back to normal colour…?
Guess we’ll never know – until the next time, of course.
Thanks for letting us accompany you, Norm. Be cool.
And an extra special thanks to Dalsland Activities, who were kind enough to put us all up for the night in their awesome teepee tents!
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Category: Norman's Adventures
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My best travelling experience was a two-month road trip around and through Australia in a tiny campervan. When they appeared, the sights were magnificent. But what I loved most about the whole thing was the relentless motion; travel in its simplest form. Because of the vast distance we needed to cover (13,000 kilometres) it was necessary to be almost constantly on the move, and this became a way of life. Nothing can quite compare to the freedom you feel when pulling out onto a road that ends in a vanishing point, fuel needle pointing to 12 o’clock. Next on my bucket list is Antarctica to see the emperor penguins. These have to be the most adorably quirky creatures on the planet (though meerkats come a close second), and nothing would give me greater pleasure than to see them waddling around in their natural environment. And speaking of the environment, I’ve always been drawn to inhospitable places; they unnerve me and excite me in equal measures, a balance which in my opinion is the epitome of a fulfilling travel experience. Or perhaps I’m just a misanthrope in denial.Subscribe
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